Showing posts with label gender binary. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gender binary. Show all posts

Friday, March 22, 2013

Reactions to the Steubenville Rape Case


It seems like the Steubenville case is on everyone’s mind this week. Whether they’re victim blaming, criticizing media coverage, acknowledging rape culture, or examining the effects of social media on the case, Steubenville has been everywhere.

This case upsets me. A lot. I’ve been following it since it came onto my feminist radar months ago. I’m familiar with the circumstances of the rape. Knowing all of this information for months, I was surprised by how hard the court’s decision really hit me. Even worse, how horrible the news coverage and social media reactions to the convictions were.

My individual perspective on this case and the reactions to the verdicts is unique. I am not trying to speak for any group; I am trying to speak for myself. I see this case through many lenses: as a feminist, as a woman, as a survivor, and as a human being.

All week long I have been reading everything I can find about the case (which probably isn’t helpful at all). I’ve lost my appetite, I’ve wanted to scream out of frustration, I’ve talked about it to people who refuse to understand, I’ve managed to carry on with my usual schedule but have come home drained and exhausted every day, and I’ve commiserated with others who are as upset as I am. All along I have been trying to put my finger on exactly why it upsets me this much. Yes, it brought back terrible memories and feelings from my past. But I’ve been reminded of these before in my life. That wasn’t the problem.

I think that what makes me so distraught about the coverage of this case is that it feels like a sharp kick to the gut, a wake-up call from the pleasant idea that rape culture is not that powerful and that society is not that misogynistic. I know we don’t live in a world of gender equality, far from it, but when I first heard about this case I thought there was no way that it could hold up in court, surely the evidence was so obvious and overwhelming that the rapists would take a plea bargain.

The picture of the survivor unconscious, being held by all limbs like a dead body, has made its way around the internet. It was obvious that she was in no place to consent, she was completely unresponsive. It was not a case of sloppy drunk decisions or misunderstood signals. There were no signals to be misunderstood, she was unconscious. Surely she was not to blame for what these young men did to her.

Instead, when this young woman came forward to seek justice against her attackers, people blamed her. Lots of people blamed her for putting herself in that position in the first place, drunk and at a party with football players. Some people even went so far to say that she made the decision to go to the party knowing that she was expected to put out, the young men just took what they deserved. Or that the perpetrators just did what anyone else in their situation would have done. Or that by drinking so much that she passed out, she was consenting to sexual activity. Even more upsetting, women were some of the most critical of the victim and the punishment for the rapists.

So what does it all mean?


Our society teaches us that men are aggressive, violent, uncontrollable, sexual beings. This means that when the rapists raped this young woman, they were just doing what anyone else would have done under the circumstances.

Our society teaches us that men should be callous, not empathetic. This means that when other young men saw the rapists sexually assaulting the survivor, they not only kept quiet but they joked about it and recorded it.

Our society teaches us that women line up along a virgin/whore dichotomy, that “good girls” stay home on Friday nights, don’t drink alcohol, don’t hang out in mixed-gender social groups, don’t dress in revealing clothes, and don’t flirt. And if girls are doing these things, then they are whores who were asking for it. This means that the young men thought they were only taking what was theirs.

Our society teaches us not to talk about sex and not to talk about rape. This means that a witness didn’t think penetration without consent was rape because the survivor didn’t look like she was violently fighting back and the rapists didn’t look like they were using brute force.

Our society teaches us that women are the gatekeepers of sex. This means that when this young women let her guard down by consuming alcohol, she was expecting to be raped.

Our society teaches us that women are vindictive, and that when their reputations are tarnished they will lie, manipulate people, and fabricate evidence to get back at someone. This means that way too many people accused the survivor of “crying rape” after an embarrassing night, completely discrediting her experience of RAPE. (While discussing the topic with others this week, the “false accusation for revenge/reputation recovery” argument was given to me a LOT, despite the evidence that shows false accusations are only 2%-8% and not much higher than false accusation across all types of crime.)

So what can we do?


TALK ABOUT IT. Call out instances rape culture. Explain rape culture to people who don’t quite get it. Educate people about what is/isn’t consent. Organize to ensure that comprehensive sex education which includes consent education is being taught in your local public schools. Don’t make rape jokes and don’t play along with other people’s rape jokes. If you see a young woman who is too intoxicated, help her get to safety. Don’t make excuses for rapists.


Note: I mentioned that I've read everything I could find about the case this week, which is basically true. That being said, this blog is my general reaction to it all, which references some of the following links and/or reacts to some of the following links:
So you're tired of hearing about rape culture? aka the best explanation of rape cul
ture I have ever read. highly recommended!
Why I won't post your comments about false rape accusations, a great resource for combatting why the false rape accusation argument is horrible AND not even true
Teacher's Blog Post: Teaching How Not to Rape
Feminist Cartoon About Rape Culture aka How I've felt ALL WEEK LONG.
Feministing: Steubenville teens are found guilty but rape culture remains alive and well

HuffPost: Sexual Assault and Rape Culture are LGBTQ Issues
**Trigger Warning** Public Shaming Tumblr full of victim blaming and rape culture - watch out, it is really, really horrible.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Stop Policing The Bathroom: Coy Mathis


The gender binary is a form of hierarchy and oppression.  Rather than uniting the human race, it divides us into two “distinct” groups. Many cisgender people take it for granted on a daily basis, as they are inherently socialized to do so. Trans* people, however, live in a culture that is vehemently ruled by the gender binary and are subject to a daily battle. 

I recently read an article by Andrea Rael, provided by Huffington Post, in which she discussed the experience of transgender first-grader, Coy Mathis, whose elementary school administration decided to stop letting her use the girls’ bathroom. The rationale? The school “took into account not only Coy but other students in the building, their parents, and the future impact a boy with male genitals using a girls’ bathroom would have as Coy grew older.” The schools decision to forgo mediation with Mathis has stirred up debate over anti-discrimination laws.

Colorado is actually one of sixteen states across the country that has an anti-discrimination law that protects transgender people. This means no discrimination, even in the public school space. Moreover, the laws implications allow for a transgender person to use the bathroom that matches their gender identity. Coy's school does not seem to agree, and they continue to argue that the Colorado law is unclear. Should I call their bluff? 

According to Rael, Mathis had been attending Eagleside Elementary School in Fountain, Colorado since 2011. The school had initially been supportive of Coy. Only recently in January of this year did the school confront Mathis and her family with the bathroom issue. Her parents decided they would temporarily pull her out school and home school her until the school acknowledged the seriousness of her case.

According to the article, Mathis’s parents have been supportive of her decisions and they have worked to be patient and understanding with her throughout the process. Although they did initially think she was going through a phase, further research and professional advice told them that they needed to support her and how she was. None of my trans* friends had early intervention or parents that were as supportive as Coy’s parents seem to be from an early age. I am affected by this piece because I have heard how complicated and scary the process can be and I wish that if not strangers then parents, atleast, would trust their trans* child. Trust that they know themselves better than anybody else. This is not a phase. This is real life. To hell with cisgender privilege--this is your kid we are talking about. 

At the tender age of six, Coy is in the prime of her formative years, and being able to use the girls’ bathroom is a crucial part of her identity development. Why? Because it is helping her affirm that people know she is a girl. The coming out process is tricky and nerve-wracking. And parental support and backing makes such a big difference. In this case, the Mathis parents filed a complaint against Fountain-Fort Carson School District 8 through the Colorado Civil Rights Division in February. Their goal is to convince the school to change its stance, which would allow Coy and future trans* students to use the bathroom corresponding with their gender identity. Yes, we are arguing about things as “base” as using the bathroom. But, this is where our gender binary system, coupled with heterosexism, has left us today. 



http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/03/19/coy-mathis-colo-transgend_n_2910066.html